Straight with it now.
[via @WeekendUpdate09]
July 2, 2009
June 30, 2009
June 27, 2009
The Crazies.
Here's my all-time favorite Tom/Spike Abbot & Costello-y exchange (9/5/06):
Spike thought Little Miss Sunshine was a nice, cute movie, and he praised the performance of "the little girl" (Abigail Breslin) and Alan Arkin's work as her grandfather. Tom hasn't seen much of Arkin since M*A*S*H ended its run, so he was glad to see him back on the screen. Spike thinks Tom is confusing Alan Arkin with Alan Aldo from President Baseball. Spike reiterates that Alan Arkin is in the film, but Tom doesn't know who that is. Spike is surprised that Tom doesn't know Arkin from The Russians Are Coming The Russians Are Coming. Tom adds to the confusion by asking Spike if it's Alan Narkin, so Spike spells his last name: A-R-K-I-N. Now Tom gets it -- it's the guy who's in Little Miss Sunshine! Tom agrees that he's very good. Spike points out that in addition to his acting, Arkin was once a member of The Tarriers, who did "Black Denim Trousers & Motorcycle Boots." Tom thinks this is a clothing company, but Spike says it was actually a song. Spike loses Tom with that one, so it's time to move on. Spike liked the cast across the board -- the mother, played by Toni Colette, Greg Kinnear, and the guy from The Office.
Spike: I always forget his name.
Tom: Ricky Gervais.
Spike: No, the American version of it.
Tom: Oh, okay, yeah, that guy is ...
Spike: The 40-Year-Old Virgin, that guy.
Tom: Yeah, Stephen Colbert.
Spike: No. His name is Steve, but that's not his last name.
Tom: Steve ...
Spike: The 40-Year-Old Virgin, but you know who I mean.
Tom: Ah, Steve Richards.
Spike: No.
Tom: No?
Spike: Carol? Carell?
Tom: Caroll Stevens?
Spike: No, not Cat Stevens.
Tom: I didn't say Cat Stevens. I said Carroll Stevens.
Spike: Well, I never heard of her.
Tom: Him. Like Carroll O'Connor.
Spike: I've heard of Caroll O'Connor, but I never heard of Carroll ...
Tom: He was not in Little Miss Sunshine, Spike. You are mistaken. Carroll O'Connor is in very poor health, and I'm sure could not have done that movie.
Spike: Carroll O'Connor's deceased.
Tom: Wait, hold on. What?
Spike: Carroll O'Connor has been deceased for a number of years now.
Tom: Oh, good heavens. I didn't realize. I send my condolences out to the rest of the O'Connor family.
June 24, 2009
June 21, 2009
The Hard Stuff.
{Yes, you've seen this clip linked to or embedded within 4,815 weblogs, 1,623 green-tinted Twittore feeds, 4 online pamphlets, and 2 JumboTron® televisions, but now is your chance to view it again right here!}
June 17, 2009
June 12, 2009
June 8, 2009
Definitely something breech-related.
Part 2: Britain loves tits.
Part 3: New Hope For The Deaf-Eared.
Part 4: A wad of loose beer tickets.
Part 5: Soft Whippy.
May 31, 2009
Stay Positive.
CLICK the above image to crack the July 2009 issue of Modern Drummer and read 10 life nuggets from Jon Wurster (Psychotic Norman, The Right Profile, Carneys), everyone's favorite jazz-fillin' funnyman and all-around Good Guy.
Here's a transcript of the exchange I had while purchasing this periodical:
BORDERS CASHIER: You play drums, huh?
OMAR: Indeed I do.*
BORDERS CASHIER: My nephew plays. I think he's in some group.
OMAR: Nachtmystium?
BORDERS CASHIER: Um ... I can't remember the name. They have a Myspace page.
OMAR: Speaking of extreme metal, you heard that Varg Vikernes is out of jail, right?
BORDERS CASHIER: Who's THAT?
OMAR: Oh, you probably know him as Count Grishnackh! Can you believe that Thurston Moore is into this stuff?!
BORDERS CASHIER: Do you have a BORDERS Rewards card?
Omar hands the gentleman his card.
OMAR: Tell your nephew to keep at it so he can become the next Mike Portnoy or Danny Peters! Don't you think Cobain should have stuck with him instead of Foo-Boy?
BORDERS CASHIER: Receipt in the bag?
OMAR: Sure. Just slip it right in there. Do you like The Melvins? Your nephew definitely needs to have an ice bell in his kit.
BORDERS CASHIER: Okay. Have a good one.
OMAR: Thanks, you too. Keep one foot in the gutter and one fist in the gold. That's what Riki Rachtman used to say at the end of Headbanger's Ball.
BORDERS CASHIER: You're a munch.
OMAR: I changed my mind. I want my receipt out of the bag. I am going to hold it aloft as I exit this store.
*This is not true, although I did take a few lessons circa 1983 and attempted to bang along to Men At Work's Cargo and Social D's Mommy's Little Monster on my Remo practice pad.
May 27, 2009
The Year Punk Pop Broke.
[WARNING: Contains filthmouth (one S and a flurry of Fs near the end) and some odd behavior resulting from unbridled sonic giddiness and a seemingly ineffective mix of prescription medications.]
